True Story - The Dishonest PhD. Student

Educationally, I came a long way. From a child whose mother's death activated a preexisting vision problems and psychological daze, to the awakening that God made possible when he put the beautiful Janet Reno in my life.

I always know that I have a reservoir of untapped brilliance, and that brilliance surfaced every now and then, even when I was in the daze. However, now I began to realize that brilliance. I discovered early in my life, that I had the ability to argue any point and win, and I even had sound rationale arguments, to destroy those points I had use to win that argument, I would have so convincing won. Hence the reason policing came so easy for me.

When I was in the tiny Island of Bermuda, I started a bachelor's degree in Business Administration, I easily earned 21 credits in three months of work. I came to realize this was child's play.

While I was still on the island on suspension, I met beautiful tourist, who was in school, she came to the island to visit friends. Her visit was a getaway, for her to relax and write a paper on Child Psychology; a paper she was now in her final extension of time to do. However, upon meeting, she spent her days running about the island with me, then returned to her room, to do her work. But it was useless she had experienced a mental block.

One day, I went to pick up my foreign friend to go on an adventure, she said, "Allan I am sorry but I cannot go with you today." In explaining why, she was unable to spend the day with me; she told me the reason she was on the island. She also told me, if she did not submit the paper by Midnight the next day, she will be thrown out of the Degree program.

I asked her "what is the subject you were asked to write on, she looked at me strange as if to say, this is beyond your ability to comprehend. Then she asked, “do you know anything about Child Psychology.” I had never took a Child Psychology class in my life; however, I looked at my beautiful friend and I said, I knows everything. Such was and is my confidence.

I asked her again, what is the subject of your paper and the format you are expected to present the paper in. She said to me hold on, she retreated to some paperwork she had, then my new friend returned, with a computer print out and she handed it to me.

I read the content of the paper. On it there were three or four options, and she had to pick one to address. She said to me, "if I do not submit this paper by the deadlines, or pass this paper; all my time and my parents money will be flushed down the toilet. I will be kicked out of the program. I need to stay here and at least, make an attempt on getting this paper done" she said.

I asked her; which one of the subjects she had decided to address; She looked at me with that look in her eyes, as if to say, he is so sweet; he is even showing interest in my problems only if he could help. She told me the topic, I said not to worry, get dress, we are going to have some fun, and tomorrow morning, I will have your paper read for you. All you will need to do is to read it over, change up the wording for it to reflect your writing style and put in the bibliography. She said I don't know about that. I said the confused lady that sat on the opposite side of the bed; please trust me on this one. My friend looked at me all confused; she said, "I have a feelings you are going to get me into big trouble then she smiled at me.

I said to her, have I ever let you down since we met?" Her smile erupted into laughter, then she said “no but, I only know you for five days.” I said to her, "In the same manner, you trusted me, a stranger, to go to all of these secluded places with, and I have never made a sexual advancement to you; and mind you, it was not that you, are not attractive, for you are very attractive, even to the point that I wished that you were my girl. But the fact is you are not and I am good with that also. So trust me on this one.

We went out and we had fun. As soon as we hit the streets, my friend transformed into fun mode; immediately, she forgot about her problems. We spent the entire day running about the island, we did lunch on the town.

The next morning, I called my friend and I told her to check her email. I got a kind of vibes, she was anxious to see what I came up with, but she was not hopeful the paper would be useful. She said OK; I will check it out. I told her that “I am going to sleep for a little bit, because I was up all morning working on your paper.”

About an hour later, my phone rang I answered the call, it was my new friend on the other end. She said Allan, did you write this paper? I said “yes I did; why did you asked?” She said; “how is it, possible, that for months, I was struggling to write this paper, I even gotten extension of time to complete the assignment, and I could not even start the paper, you saw the assignment yesterday, and you were able to complete this paper, at such high standard in a matter of hours. I said to my friend, it is Just a gift God give to me. She said Allan, I am not going to change anything. I am going to submit as is.

Some weeks later, my friend called me, from the USA, she was all excited, she said Allan, I passed, my course thanks to you. It is the highest grade I have ever received its the equivalent to an A+. I need to reward you for your help. Then she offered to pay me. I said "I did that as a good deed from one friend to another". I then continued, you have already paid me.

Confused she said what do you mean. “I said “I was under tremendous stress, when I met you, and when you consented to be a good sport and spending time with you, the time with you; gave me the opportunity to put my problems into perspective, and relaxed me. You have already paid for that paper." I then thanked my now distance friend for her help; by letting me be her chaperone while on the island and for providing therapeutic help to me. Needless to say, I never seen that person again.

Later in 2009, I was living, in New York City (NYC). While chatting with a friend on the phone, just catching up on old time. This person was enrolled in a bachelor's degree program. I inquired of my friend how was the program going. She said to me, she had been stuck on a paper that she need to submit; she too had also requested some extension of time from her school to complete the paper. I said to my friend, I have a little business where, I do papers for people like you.

This lady had read my writings previously and loved them. She said I don't know about that. I said I guarantees you pass and it will be your best score ever. This lady had some money. She said OK how much. I said $400.00 for the paper two hundred to get me started and two hundred when you get the paper. My friend send me the money Western Union, the same evening and she emailed me the instructions to me. The following day, I sent her her paper. Some weeks later she informed me, she had her best grade yet from the paper I wrote, after that she began to refer her friends to me. this was my first official client and a satisfied one indeed

Some time later, Patricia Marksman, a Vincentian living in NYC, a small business owner who is a financial investment manager and personal banker, invited me to a wine and cheese party at her home. This was an opportunity for her to build her clientele by introduce new people to the service she offers. At that event, there was a chiropractor, (Who we will call Susan for this story) at the function, we began to chat. And then she told me she was enrolled in a doctoral program, which she was about to get kicked out of because of an assignment that was still outstanding.

She was on her final extension of time, I know she was desperate, I told her, God invited her to this function just to meet me. I told her I have a business where I write paper for people who found themselves in a similar bind like she was currently in. I said you can either get kicked out of the program because you will be tomorrow any way; or you can hair me to write your paper for you.

I asked her what is the subject and the format they are expecting your paper to be in. I told her it will cause her $400.00 dollars, I need $200.00 now and the rest later. Susan agreed to the arrangement, then she said, unfortunately today is Sunday, the banks is close and I did not walk with my debit card. Can I pay you tomorrow. I will pay you the four hundred dollars after I review the paper. I agreed, after all she was Pat’s friend; I did not expected any problems. So I agreed to the terms Susan had set. Being confident in my ability It was going to be an easy four hundred dollars.

Later that night, after reviewing my email; Susan had forward to me; the email from her professor. I review the information and I proceeded to write the paper for Susan. The following morning I emailed, the document to Susan; who promised to pay me after she review the paper. I had no doubt that it was a good paper. After all, she had only a few hours before her deadline was up.

An hour or so later, I received a phone call from Susan, she told me that she do not need my paper, because she figured it out and she got it done on her own. I knew Susan was lying, She did not want to pay me for my work. I said to her, how is it, for three months you could not start the paper you were assigned; how is it after you received the paper I wrote for you; addressing the topic you wanted, you have worked it out. 

I was upset, I spent the night writing this paper, and now she is going to renege on our agreement. I know Susan was going to use my work get a pass and she was not going to pay for it. The first thing I did was to called Pat Markman; hoping that she would be able to get my money from her friend. It was then Pat told me, the lady was not her friend; she was just a lady she met, whom she was trying to recruit, as a client.

I was upset, I could not have this dishonest woman, used my work and get away with it. But there was nothing that I could do. I said to myself, Only if I can get to the professor; to see if there was anything I can do. It was then I got an idea, I opened one of my blog page, I post the content of the paper I wrote for Susan as a blog, then I post the content as a blog online. After which; I went back to the email, Susan had forwarded to me that had her professor’s email address on it. I copy the professor's email address from the email, I send an email to Susan’s professor with a link to the blog post, I have just post on line which have now became the published work of Allan H. Palmer and I copied the email to Susan.

Even if Susan's Professor would not have check my email because it was from a strange email address, I knew it will catch his attention when he recognized the name of his student on the document. Even if the professor did not open the email. Susan will not submit that work to her professor. Because it is now consider published work of Allan H. Palmer. For her to submit such work as a course paper, she would be considered to have a plagiarize my work.

I did not get pay from my hard work and effort; however, I got my revenge and I prevent my work from being used by a crook.


Foot Note:


Ironically, While I was still in NYC, Ralph Gonsalves send one of his victims, to solicit my help with a paper, I knew the young lady was one of Ralph Gonsalves' rape victims, I also knew he had full control over the lady; I knew nothing good was going to come of this business relationship. Yet I accepted the job; this was my first Vincentian client and it was a quick couple hundred US dollars.


A few days later, the lady emailed me and said she failed the paper, I said to her, I doubt you failed the paper, I have done papers for people all over the Caribbean, and for people all over the USA, all of my clients had top grade for the paper I did. The first Vincentian I did a paper for and you failed; impossible I said. I agree to return the young lady's money and she agreed to take it. However, while we were talking, I said to the lady, it is either one of two things, it's either you submitted the paper you were working on, or you have mess around with the paper I wrote, taking out and putting in stuff and you messed up the documents. When I made the statements, the lady said, don't worry with the money, you worked for it.


When I arrived in California, I wrote four papers for a person I got to know, however that person was not in a position to pay my normal asking price. And because we hang out together, I accepted, very little from him, because he could not afford to pay any more. As a result, he said to me, Palmer, I know some people, at USC who can use your services, what if I get you the job and we split the money 60/40; wanted 60%. I said to myself.


I prevented this man from being thrown out of University of Southern California, instead he get me the business to subsidized the small fee I accepted from him, to show how grateful he was, he is trying to make a profit off of me. That was the last paper I wrote for him and I stop hanging with him. Each time he sees me, he will scribble in the air with his hands and open both hand as to asked me. When I am going to help him.

True Story: Who Give Inspector Charles a Heart Attack

It was only a few months into Ralph Gonsalves first term as Prime Minister, and he was sharing away promotion like crazy. He was fulfilling promises he made to people in order to get votes; one such person was Cornelius Charles. Cornelius Charles was a police officer and had the force number 313. Charles was a Sergeant of Police for many years before I became a police officer. Now, I had served eight years as a police officer and Charles was still a Sergeant of Police. Ralph Gonsalves, promoted Cornelius Charles, to inspector he was skipped Charles over the rank of Station Sergeant to inspector, and he put him in charge of the Traffic Department.

All this time, I was assigned to the Eastern Caribbean Supreme Court, with specifically assigned duties to Justice Don Mitchell, High Court Judge. Inspector Cherry Lip Charles were transferred to the Traffic Branch with one of two objective, the first was to get me in trouble and the other was to pressure me into fear of him and submission to Ralph Gonsalves. This was going to be a very tall order, even for the man who was known to vie for the title of the greatest liar in the St. Vincent and the Granadines Police Force.

Charles was an old time police officer, he was nicknames Cherry Lip because of the disfiguration to his face, which included his eyes and lips. The Story was told, while Charles was a young police officer working at the traffic Branch riding the police big powerful motorcycles. Someone waited until he was coming at high speed, tied a chain across the road, which caught him and resulted in the disfigurement of his face.

This was so for the following reasons, many officer of senior rank, had tried this before and failed. Even the baddest man in the St. Vincent had the Grenadines Police Force: Superintendent Osborne Quow had tried and failed. I did not and do not care who they were, what position of authority they held, or what level on the social ladder they were on; I was not going to create a god out of any man; by being afraid of them. And that was just the way it was.

The newly promoted inspector, first approached was to pretend to befriend me. One day, he called me into his office, and began to questioned me about Justice Mitchell's personal business. I was shocked, to think this man thought so poorly of me; a sworn law enforcement officer, my integrity as a Palmer, and the reputation I had developed as an honest man within police circles. Just the thought that the inspector expected me to breach the confidence the police authorities who assigned to that responsibility; the thought the inspector concluded that I will just breach the trust, the Judge put in me, to violate such confidence at his request; upsetted me.

I was appalled at the inspector's assertion, I said to the inspector, "my assignment with Justice Mitchell is not to investigate the judge. I was sent to work with the Judge because, the authority had confidence in my integrity, not to betray the judge's trust and confidence with anyone." Then I said to him; “I cannot discuss the Judge's personal business with you. So don't ask me to.” Inspector Charles did not take my reply too well; he said to me in reply; "You think you are a big boy because you are working with the Judge."

Some weeks later, I was called into the inspector's office and from that day forward, he wanted to see me every day. He wanted to see me in his office every day and everyday the inspector curst me out about Ralph Gonsalves. Inspector Charles accused me of wanting to bring down Mr. Gonsalves' government, "But not as long as I am a live, not over my dead body" he said. Each day Mr. Charles curst me out and he even threatened to throw me into the cell in the old Colonrie Police Station.

Once Mr. Charles took out a large photograph of Ralph Gonsalves and he said to me, as he pointed at the photo, "you see this man ya, I love him to death." Then he kissed the photo of Ralph Gonsalves. This is some strange romantic gay shit; it was too far about my pay grade and I had nothing to do with that. I did not know what I was to take away from that display of intimate affection demonstrated to me and displayed to a photograph of Ralph Gonsalves, except to conclude, maybe; the newly promoted inspector was Ralph Gonsalves gay lover.

Every day, I went into Inspector Charles' office, I looked at him with a smile on my face, as he worked himself into a frenzy, defending Ralph Gonsalves and his government against me. I have heard the worst of cussing in St. Vincent and the Grenadines from members of the Bottom Town community; the community in which I was born, grew up and was still living.

Charles words meant nothing to me. Inspector Charles hated to see me with a smile on my face, while he was all serious, issuing threats to me, trying his hardest to make me afraid of him. The inspector's expressed vocal rage, could be heard in the general office even beyond the closed doors of his office. He often shout at me "Constable Palmer, this is not a joke, this is no a laughing matter” he often said. "Serant Browne, is this a laughing matter," as Sergeant Richard Browne who was always a part of the meeting, sheepishly reply as if he had water in his mouth when he speak, "no sir, this is no joking matter."

All this time, Inspector Cornelius Charles had arranged for me, an enlisted police officer, to be taken to open court as a defendant, on some bogus, trumped up charges, that was approved by then Commissioner of Police: William Harry, who was a practicing Christian. These charges was brought against me by Corporal Kenneth "Scratchy" John.

As the inspector shout, issue threats, and worked himself into a frenzy like a mad man from hell; All I did, was to look at him, with a big smile on my face, and dear him, with my smile to leave his seat, come and lay hands on me. I said to myself, he can argue all he wanted to, however, the moment he build the courage, to get up from behind his desk, come into my space and lay hands on me for any reason, I was going to teach the inspector a lesson of his life; a lesson he would have never forget. Self-defense is always a good legal defense, in retaliation to violence, the perception or the threat of violence.

One Thursday Morning, I was sitting in the Transport Section office with my Supervisor, Sergeant Adam Billingy, when the news came, Inspector Cornelius Charles, was driving to work, upon reaching, the juc-y building, in Kingstown. He stopped his vehicle, called the ambulance and was rushed to the Kingstown General Hospital where he was treated for a mile heart attack.

Inspector Charles was later discharged, with a prescription, told to take it easy, and to make some changes in his lifestyle. He was also encouraged to eliminate any stressful situation in his life. The next day, Friday morning, Mr. Charles came into the office, he was at the entrance of the office relating the experience of his mild heart attack to those of the staff who was in the main Traffic Branch office.

I walked into the office; upon seeing me going into the little office that was the Transport Section's office, he said, "PC Palmer come here," I went to the inspector in compliance to his call. The inspector looked at me and in a very subdued voice he said, “yo see you, you are not killing me in this place, you are not giving me another heart attack. Gather your belonging, I am transferring you to Biabou. Tomorrow morning, report to Biabou Police Station.

It was on common, for officers to be transfer on weekend, however; this was a special situation, Inspector Charles was concerned for his medical health and personal well being. The next day, I reported to the Biabou Police Station, Sergeant Ashley Francis was in charged of the Biabou police Station; He suggested I go for a patrol and on my first day in the Biabou Police District I got into big basa basa.

Biabou police District I got into big basa basa.

True Story - Police Officer Kenneth Scratchy John: did he or didn't he?

While I was a police officer, on the island of St. Vincent and the Grenadine; I owned and operated a small business. I offered to the public, driving lessons on my off day. I taught students how to drive. A lot of the student that came to me, came after their relationship with their previous tutors, did not worked out. These were merely difficult students. My simple way of communicating seems, to go down well with everyone.

I had one exceptional student, I still considers that student, the best driving student, I worked with during my time as a driving tutor. This was a lady I knew for a long time. She was a new registered nurse and had friends at and was a friend of the Traffic Branch. She often come by the department and chat with the guys.

Working with a nurse (whom I will call Nurse Cecile for the story) was simple. It was so easy to work with the nurse, that she was the only student, I will take the chance and take out for a driving lesson, when I was tired. This was so because; I did not need to be as vigilant with her. Driving came natural to the nurse and she drove so well.

One morning, I drove to Nurse Cecile's home, and I picked her up for a lesson. Nurse Cecile's deteriorated level of driving was cause for concern. I told her to pull over to the side of the road and stop the car; which she did. I stop being a driver's tutor, and I became a concerned friend. I said to the nurse, something is wrong, and I offered to discussed her problem with her. At first the nurse refused to confide in me, not because she didn't want to, but for two reasons, because what was worrying her was so shameful; she could not stomach the fact that she had became a victim of a trusted friend. What could be even more serious than, to be raped by a police officer, a man whose paid and sworn duty was to keep her safe.

I was shocked when Nurse Cecile told me, the night before; the then Corporal (Cpl.) Kenneth "Scratchy" John came to her home, she went outside, to chat with him, after standing at her gate for a while he suggested, they go for a ride while they chat instead of him blocking the narrow road with his car. This will prevent him from having to stop their conversation, in order to move his car for vehicles to pass, as he had to do a few times while they stood there chatteing.

Nurse Cecile felt safe with Cpl. 'Scratchy" John, because they were friends, and more importantly; he was a police officer. As a result, she consented to leave her home and go with her police friend, for a drive and a chat. What was interesting, was Cpl. John had never expressed a sexual interest in her. for him to do so, it would have been an act of betrayal, for the mere fact; the nurse friendship with the traffic branch, was started by one of Cpl. John's colleague and close working friends. A person who had a love interest in Nurse Cecile.

However; Cpl. Scratchy John drove to Arnos Vale playing field, while on his way there, he tried the old and over use trick of hand slipped off of this gear sitck and touch Nurse Cecile's leg. Not taking much of it. She said to him, "hear na, it's not that type of Party". On reaching the Arnos Vale Playing Field, Scratchy parked the car and being to touch her, legs, brest and other parts of her body, she tried to stop the Corporal, but she being a woman was no match for his strength.

As a result, police officer, Cpl. Kenneth "Scratchy" John, then sexually forced himself upon Nurse Cecile, and without her permission, he used his fingers and his penis to penitrated the nurse's vagina. In legal term Cpl. Kenneth "Scratchy' John raped my student driver, the friend of the Traffic Department and love interest of his colleagues: the Nurse.

I had no doubt, that my student: the Nurse was speaking the truth, for it explained, her lack of or her inability to consentrate on her driving, which was never a problem before; and her complete lack of control of the vehicle, which she always exhibit a command over.

I will forever be ashamed of what happened next. In all of my life, and in my eight years of policing (my years of service at the time), I have never heard of such thing. A man who was entrusted with the enforcement of the law, and in whom such great authority was entrusted; a man whose paid and "SWORN" obligation was to protect the community, could participate in such great betrayal, of the state trust, his sworn and paid obligation, to the citizens of St. Vincent and the Grenadine. How could he actually do such a thing, baffled me. I was afraid, if such a thing get out into the public, the police force will never survived such a scandal; was my mind set.

I did not tell Nurse Cecile not too go to the Commissioner of Police, as she expressed intention of doing, but I was dropping hints which suggested she should not report the matter to the Commissioner of Police. As a result of another intervention, Nurse did not report the matter to the Commissioner of Police. As she planned to.

Another rapist that got away, and I had a hand in his evasion of prosecution. Because of the fact, a man just don't wake up one morning, as an adult and decides, I am going to become a rapist, and because Cpl. John's actions was so bold. I often asked myself, how many women was raped by Cpl. Kenneth "Scratchy" John before he raped my student the Nurse and how many women was raped by him after he raped the nurse.

Because of his office, if such raped occurred before and or after the raped of my student, most likely they will go unreported; because the victim feels no one will believe them or no police officer will entertained their report. After all they are required to report their rape by a police officer to the police. To steal a quote from Donald Trump - Sad.

True Story: Grabing a life from the jaws of death - Dwayne "Chucky Mitchell

I had returned to church in late 1985 after a life threatening injury, in early August of that same year. Injuries that caused the public to make the declaration, which turned into nation wide news: “Allan Palmer the Rollerskates man is dead! After I returned to church, I later became Baptized by Seventh Day Adventist Pastor: Steve Philips.

 I left the church when I was about, 9 or 10 years old; just after my mother's death. Before my mother's death, I loved going to church, I loved to listen to my mother read me Bible stories, I knew all of the Bible stories, and I would die for the gospel, at lease that was my mindset. I knew about the approaching time of trouble, the Mark of the beast and the prophecies, and it all made sense. After mother's death, I stop going to church, I stop praying, I stopped reading the Bible, but I always kept a sense of God, and I acted like he was always around.

Now, I was back in church and it was the carnival season. I decided to attend my first major church event, Carnival picknick at Warriacou beach. It was the first time I went to Warriacou beach and immeditely, the place spoke to me. This place was perfect, the layout of the beach, the way the wave so peacefully and gracefully rolled in from the ocean and on to the shore. There was something inviting about this beach. Why weren't there more people flocking to this beautiful and peaceful beach I asked myself.

from going into the water, the first thing I noticed about the beach was; there was a strong circular current, that sweeps from the East, and pulls West along the shore line; then the current pulled South out into the ocean. The current is nothing to be afraid of. The strange current is as a result, of the topography of the beach, the location of the reefs, and the way the waves broke in conjunction to the reef.

Very early into the fun on the beach, a young man got caught in the current and began to panic, he began to call for help. Everyone on the picknice began to panic; the shout went up; some one needs help! someone needs help! Being a very good and very strong swimmer; I swam to the immediate area of the fellow who was in distress, I noticed panic was written all over the young man's face; he stretched his hands to me, for me to help him.

We were out in the deep part of the beach. I said to the fellow, "calm down, you can swim, you don't need that type of help from me." I said to the youth "look at me, I am here with you, and nothing is happening to me. It is only the current," I told the guy to relax and then he realized we were in the same condition, he began to relax, I then told him to follow me. When he did, we made it back to the shore safely using the same current.

Sister May Mitchell, was also on the trip with her young grandson Dwayne. Sister Mitchell had a Baygon dinghy, which she may have won from T. Geedies Grant and company Ltd. T. Geedies Grant was a popular wholesale, imports and department store, in Kingstown. These plastic boats were a part of the insect killer: Baygon promotion, that was put on that summer. I remember well because, I tried to win one but I did not.

Sister Mitchell had the dinghy all inflated, but was not willing to risk her grandson's life by handing him over to anyone. When she saw my bravery, and my swimming ability, which was put on display by going into the current to assist the young men who were in distress; she asked me if I can take Dwayne out for a ride in the plastic, Baygon inflatable boat. Without a doubt, I did after all, what could happen? The sea was calm and nice, I understood the tide in the area, and she had a small boat. At least I didn't win one of the boats, but now I am getting the opportunity to enjoy the boat I wanted so bad.

Dwayne was still very small. I stayed close to the shore with the kid in his cool little boat, I pushed him around, as his grandmother and great grandmother: Brenata Soleyn and other females from the church, sat under one of the big amond trees that can be found sprinkled along the beach; enjoying the shade and a conversation. Even though Sister May was sitting with the other women chatting, her main focus was on her grand son in the water.

Every now and then I realized that the tide had pulled us out to far from the shore, when that happened, I mounted the dinghy, putting my chest upon the stern of the inflatable plastic boat, whilst my waist and legs were still in the water, I used my arms, like I was swimming, while kicking of my legs and feet in order to propell the boat in the direction, I wanted and get us back to the safety and comfort of the shore; Keeping in compliance with Sister Mitchell's instructions.

The sea was calm and nice, perfect for a picknick and for frolicking with the young child, in his cool plastic, boat. I was having so much fun, I did not notice there was a change in the tide. Duing the time the tide changed from low tide to high tide. The change of the tide is directed by the moon, and it occurrs ever six hours. I did not notice because I was having so much fun and I had safely swam in all type of tide before; even in seas that was pushed around by tropical storms force winds, in order to ride the big wave, on the large pieces of styrofoam we collected from the trash when Denabrago did repairs to their ice house.

While I was in the middle of having fun, ensuring Dwayne had a good time, once again the tide took us a little further out than that which Sister May was comfortable. I was about to make my way back to the shore. It was then I beheld a large wave coming toward and at us. The wave was large enough to double me up, along with the young child and the little boat. So I decided to go to the wave in order meet the wave, before it broke on us. As a result, I mounted the stern of the little boat, as I have been doing, to get us back to the safety of the shore. However, this time, I was paddled away from the shore and towards the wave, I reach the crest of the wave before it broke, and we ride over the wave smooth and nice. I was proud of myself and my efforts. Now it was time to make my way back into the safety of the shore with the young child.

When I looked up I saw another wave coming at us; this one was a bigger than the one I have just met and safely ride over. I had no choice but to do the same thing once again. As a result, I began to paddle in a swimming motion with both hands and feet. This wave was bigger and it started from further out in the sea than the first one did. I paddled hard, I didn't want to be caught in this wave, not because I was afraid of the wave but because of the precious life, I was given charge and custody over. I paddled hard and I just bearly managed to get over the wave safe and without incident.

By this time, the events had gotten the attention of the picknickers that had assembled on the beach, on the carnival Tuesday. I looked at the sure and I got further away from the safety of the sure. I can see Dwayne's grand mother and the other people looking on; they were all on their feet looking out at the sea. I knew they were looking at the confrontation that was being played out in the ocean before their very eyes. The confrontation between the sea, against myself, the child and small inflatable boat I had in my possession. I was convinced the sea was trying to embarrass me in public; at lease, I had won and save the embarrassment.

The real danger, the threat to the child's life, did not hit me as yet. Even at that time, I could not imagine that happening; it just never crossed my mind. However, I had just successfully road over two large waves, I was exhausted, now it was time to get to the safety of the shore and hand Dwayne over to the safety of his grandmother. Before I could have finished that thought, I could not believe what happened next.

I saw another and even bigger wave heading to us. By this time, I was exhausted, from all the swimming, frolicking with Dwayne, and the rush to ensure the two previous waves did not turn the boat over, etc.

Now I had a bigger problem that confronted me, I had no choice; I had to meet and ride this wave as I did the previous waves. I did not had the time to dismount the dingy, from when I met and road the first wave. So I began to paddle with an even greater level of urgency. I was exhausted, my lungs had been put to the test which climaxed with the safe ride over the second wave. But now I must confront my biggest challenge for the day. The monster of the wave that was heading to me; seems to be mockingly speaking to me. Denouncing the size and the efforts of the two previous waves, and dearing me in my exhaustion to meet, mount and smoothly ride over him in the same manner I did the two previous waves.

I dug deep down within me and I paddled with a sense of, and with an even greater urgency, both my arms and legs were working over time now, I was making good distance in quick time. I paddled harder, faster and stronger than I did the other times. Now I was almost there, I was just about to celebrate, the success of my efforts. The word I did it, had flashed acrossed my mind; When the little boat reach the crest or the peek of the wave. All this time, unaware of the danger, the little nieve passenger, was having the most fun, he have ever had in his life, up to that point.

It was close but not close enough to make it completely over the wave. I felt the little plastic boat going backwards, instinctively, I pulled myself further up upon the little boat, I encircled the littel boat with both of my arms, interlocking my fingers, while pressing Dwayne into my chest. I knew what to expect, because I have been doubled up by big waves many times before even as a child. It was going to be about six or seven second of under water bashing; of being turned inside out, collisions with the sea floor. After the wave had chewed its victims up, it always scornfully spats them out close to the shore line. It is not a bad experience; as a matter of fact, it is a nice rush to be doubled up.

The wave did just as I expected, and I held on to the dinghy like our life depended on it. The wave bashed us around within it, it took us to the sea floor; this caused the air in the inflatable dingy to pull the dinghy upwards in and effort to remind on the top of the water where it belong; while at the same time, the sea that had full control of the solid masses, kept us submerged. The two overpowering forces was to great for me to keep my hold onto the small inflatable boat; which resulted in the inflatable boat become separated from me, releasing Dwayne from my grasp in the process.

It was the first time, I panicked in the situation. I began to franticly search the seafloor with my hands for Dwayne. My eyes were open but, I was unable to see anything. I was blinded by the sand and other debris that was stired up by the pounding of the extremely large waves.

How am I going to explained Dwayne's death and possible dissapearance to Sister Mitchell, I asked myself, while I scour the Seafloor with my hand. I could not lived with myself, if I did not find this child and I surely cannot face Sister Mitchell without her grandson. What am going to tell her I asked myself, all the while, I was franticly search the Seafloor for the child I was entrusted with. It was after considering all these thoughts, that flooded my mind in a nanosecond. I made a very serious decision, I will not surface without the child. He is was my responsibility until I handed him back to his guardian in this case: his grandmother.

As a result, I stayed submerged, in search for the missing child and I was not going to surface without him. I searched with a level and a sense of urgency, but to no avail. And then my hand touched something that felt very soft, unlike the touch of a human body. I quickly grab at the object before the under water turbulence take it away from my grasp. I was not going to take any chances, I held onto the object pulled it towards me for a closer examination. This could have been anything, from a dead seasnake to a random object that was washed into the sea by the rain via one of the many gutters or streams that emptied into the sea. I was desperate, I pray to God it was the child, who was lost in the turbulence. But from my first touch I was convinced it was not, it was too mushy.

When I examined the object with both hands, I realized it was a small child, it could only be one child that was Dwayne. I pulled him close to my chest, then I quickly surfaced, having lost track of time because of exhaustion, fear, the deep thoughts, and a decision I hope I will never have to make again.

When I surfaced, I looked at the child and it was Dwayne. I heard Dwayne coughed, and a big bubble of snat run out of his nose, I knew he was alive. By this time everyone on the beach attention was fixed on me and the child that was lost in the turbulence.

While I was making my way out of the sea, as the breaking waves gently slap the back of my legs pushing me forward as if they knew I was exhausted and needed their help. I walked away with both of our life in tact. It was as if, the waves that slapped the back of my legs, just hard enough to pushing me forward was congratulating me for a job well done, in snatching life of this child from the jaws of death and for not giving up.

By this time SIster Mitchell was down close to the sea, I then handed the exhausted child back to his grandmother and I went relaxed and ate. While I looked at the deceptive beauty of the place; I noticed the sea that was raging with anger only a moment ago went back to a state of peace. This place has a beauty that enticingly speaks to me. To this date no one ever knew Dwayne was lost in the turbulence and accounted for, for a moment.

A few years later, my schoolmate, classmate and friend Bert Bailey and two of his colleagues, lost their life at that beach. I was not there, but I has a sneaking suspicious, they tried to render help to a person in distress in the same manner the individual in the beginning of this story wanted me to help him. This type of assistance is and will always be a recipe for disaster. It is always better to revive a man who was render unconscious by the sea than to try to save a conscious man in distress in the sea who fear drowning.

When I was a police officer, in St. Vincent and the Grenadines when I was on duty, and I was in that area going to and from my police duties, I often drive down that lonely road and visit with the sea and enjoy the serenity and beauty of that place. Never forgetting the deception that comes along with the beauty.

Facebook reactions

https://www.facebook.com/allan.palmer/posts/10156369808304272

A tree Called Mange

Hello, my name is Mang and this is my story. This is not a story great adventure, where the hero rescues the princess from grave danger and they run away together, get married and live happier ever after. However this is a simple story, which shows, how God works. If God can use a worthless thing like me to perform a small but significantly important act that positively changed my existence forever, he can also use you and change your live forever.

I was a sucker taken from a big and mighty tree, I was planted in an extremely fertile field, by Farmer John. I was watered every day when there was a dry spell, and I was fertilized on a regular basis. My life was good and I was happy. I was growing well and Farmer John had big plans for me when I mature. Ever-so-often, Farmer John will come around with his ax, he will look for and chop down the trees that were not growing as he expected them to, He did this to create more space for the other trees to strive and reach their maximum potential. The trees that were cut down before they mature, were used for fire wood, for cooking or to be burn in the fire place, on cold days to provide heat.

I knew, I was place on this earth to do something great, I will be important and I am destined for great things, but what exactly, I do not know. May be I will be an expensive piece of furniture in some rich person’s luxurious home or maybe I will hold books in a library. I have so much to look forward too.

 Everything was going wonderful, I was living up to expectation, Like the other trees, I was growing well; I was expanding in height and width. Farmer John was so please with my progress, that sometimes, he will come over to me and hit me three firm examining strokes with his open palm, as if he was testing how solid I was. He only do that to those of us who he was really expecting great things from.

 Then I realized, the other tree around me began to get bigger and taller than I was, and because they were taller than I was; I was not getting the sunlight I need to grow big and strong. We all know that trees cannot grow and produce without sunlight. The sun light was there, but I did not have access to it; because, before the sunlight reached me, it was blocked by the bigger taller trees. I knew that if I do not grow in width and height, I will be chopped down before I become fully mature, and if that happened, then my dreams of being important will be shattered. I will not be used for fire wood, immediately, because, I was big enough to make some unimportant piece of furniture. A piece of furniture that everyone ignores and take for granted.

 One day the farmer came over to where I was planted and he looked at me with sad, disappointing eyes, he sag his lips in reluctance, and although he did not say a word, I knew exactly what he was thinking. Farmer John really thought, I would have been one of his best trees in this upcoming harvest. This made me really sad, but I did not have any control over how I grow, Life is so unfair. After standing there looking at me for a while, Farmer John began to swing his ax and very soon, I was lying on the ground, detached from my root.

He had chopped me down; I had some value but not much. I was too big to make fire wood, for to use me as fire wood would be a waste but I was not big enough to be sold to the carpenter; so Farmer John threw me in the corner behind his wood shed. I was thrown behind the wood shed, because I was not valuable enough to be place in the wood shed; the wood shed was for the timber that were going to be sold to one of the many carpenter shops. I was sadden by what I become, I sat idle and useless, all my potential was lost. I will never be important, I will never be of value.

One day, Farmer John sold me to the inn keeper and I was made into a feeding tray for Barn Animals. I was so disappointed, because my existence took a turn for the worst. I was very unhappy in my given role, as a feeding tray, when the animals ate, they slobber their saliva all over me, I was often stepped upon and sat upon; I was kicked over so many times, I have lost count. They vomited on me, they urinated on me and they have even defecated on a few times. From all the rough treatment, one of my leg is about to fall off. Any more rough treatment my bad leg will soon fall of, and I will be unable to stand on one leg, unable to balance or hold anything. I will be useless. I would have been better off as fire wood, at least I would have kept someone worm on a cold night.

One day, a young couple came into the stable, there was no room in the inn, so the young couple was allowed to stay in the stable, in order to keep the couple out of the cold weather and away from bad men who may try to rob and kill them. The man gathered hay together, then he spread a blanket over the hay he had gather together, so his pregnant wife could be comfortable. It was clear that the man love his wife very much, and it showed in the he was very attentive to her and her needs. Every five minutes he can be heard saying, “Mary are you ok?”

I was deep in thought, feeling sorry for myself all overwhelmed by dejection. When I heard the high pitch voice of Mary shouted, Joseph come quickly, immediately the attentive husband came running to her side. To my surprise, the lady went into child’s birth and delivered the baby in the stable. This was the most exciting thing that have ever happened since I was put here.

The lady took me and with very delicate and kind hands she cleaned me. Ooo! How good it feel to be clean, I felt like new except for my old, weak, broken leg that may fall of at any time and for any given reason; especially, if something heavy was placed in me. Then Mary gentle and methodically lay clean dry hay in me, from the care the young mother took in selecting and placing the hay in me, I knew she was special, because she touch me with such love and tenderness, she made me feel very important, I knew I was being prepared for some important task. This task may not be important to the world, but it was very important to this young mother, and that was enough for me.

After she methodically spread the hay in me, she gentle spread a blanket over the hay making a nice soft cushion, after which, with the care that only a mother knows, she gentle laid the baby on the soft cushion in me. The child was much heavier than the hay and my weak, broken lag began to give way, but I had to hold it together. I could not let this new mother down, I could not make this baby fall. I cannot fail in the execution of such an important mission. It is much bigger and better than anything I have ever done and I may never get another opportunity like this again. I am so thankful for this opportunity. Who would have ever thought that I this old Manger would have become a baby’s bed? The little feeding tray was very happy. He got to hold a new born baby.

Then something happened, out of thin air, I saw some people I have never seen before, they just appeared. They were Angels, I did not know Angels exist, Mang said to himself, I thought they were like fairies, only imaginary beings; but they really exist. Mang was shocked, by the appearance of the angels but the little feeding tray was devastated by what the angels said. Are you kidding me! Said the feeding tray. Are you kidding me! He repeated the words again. His weak legs began to tremble with fear. Mang had just understand the gravity, of the assignment, he was called to perform. Am I really carrying the son God? The one of whom the prophets spoke about hundreds of years ago. Nooooooo! Mange said in disbelief. 

Then the shepherds came into the Stable and they looked at the baby with great amazement, as they whispered to each other, then they told a very interesting story; they spoke of the angels that appear to them while they were in the field, keeping watch over their flocks and told them that the Christ (the savior) was born. The angel knew they were looking for the savior that was foretold in the Holy Scriptures. They also told them to follow the star, so they did and the star led them to this stable, they wanted to see their Savior for themselves. 

 A few days later, three Kings came from distance land; the three Kings came into the stable dressed in their royal garb bearing gifts of Gold and other precious things. They spoke of the starts in the eastern skies which led them to the stable, and what was revealed to them from the study of the Holy Scripture, and the Prophecy; the Son of God was to be born in the city of David. They said they follow the star and they came to worship him. There were praises and adoration going up to heaven and to the child. I saw king fall onto their knees before me in worship of the little baby I was given the Godly honor and the privilege to hold.

Do you understand what is happening here? This baby that is sleeping peacefully in me is the son of God! The son of God is God. Now that I think of it. It all makes sense. It was God who made me, it was God who put that sense of importance within me, it was God who prevent me from growing into a mighty tree, It was God that caused me to be chopped down before I matured, it was God who cause me to be made into a feeding tray for animals, it was God who placed me in this stable. All the things I thought were bad things that happened to me, was really God preparing me for this awesome assignment. I was chosen by God out of billions of trees to bear his only son when he was born. All that I went through, God was preparing me to be the bearer of his only son and I will not fail him.

Always remember that God is preparing you to do something mighty for him, whether or not your assignment is recognized by the world, more importantly, it is appreciated by the Creator of the universe and everything that exist. God’s way of preparing us will make us perfect for the job he wants us to do. It does not matter what happens to me from here on in. I have been used by God in a simple but very important way.

True Story: Allan P and the Jewels and God V/S Venus John

Allan P and the Jewels was a hot, ground breaking Gospel Rap group from the Island of St. Vincent and the Grenadines, in the Caribbean that was made up of Nelcia “Ali” Primus, Comsy Joyette, Desiree Murphy and Allan Palmer. Allan Palmer was the leader of the group and the main performer as the name of the group suggest. Allan was trying to get the girls into the spot light, but they were quite happy playing the role they were playing and did not one to take on or share the lead position.

Although Ali was not Adventist, Adventist leadership especially, those from the Kingstown Seventh Day Adventist Church considered the group an Adventist group, and were not going to stop at nothing, until they had destroy the group. This was so because Desiree, Comsy and I were affiliated to the Adventist community and were members of the Kingstown Seventh Day Adventist Church.

Allan P & the Jewels were a featured acts in the Caribbean biggest gospel show “Gospel Spectacular”. This very popular regional gospel show was hosted by the Emeralds Gospel Band, and featured the Caribbean biggest Gospel acts; of which Allan P and the Jewels were ranked. We were new, we were edgy and we were good. Desiree, Ali, Comsy and Allan took the bulls by the horn and we did our thing.

Our message was solid but to the leadership of the Kingstown Seventh Day Adventist Church, that did not matter, they insisted that we dismantled, however; we held our ground. When we organized and held our concert all hell broke loose among the church leadership. It was a rush to persuade the youths and other church members not to support the concert.

There was a new convert, by the name of Venus John. Venus was readily accepted, in the big shot click, because she held an executive position at the nation's only, and state own AM radio station, The National Broadcasting Corporation 705 Radio. She was a mother of two teenagers, her daughter with whom I became very good friend, who also attended the Kingstown Seventh Day Adventist Church regularly, and her son who came to church, only when he was forced to. But they were all good kids. However, she was sent to infiltrate the church, to be used at the right time a goal which she accomplished.

Venus and I also had a good relationship. She was new and trying to find where she fitted in; and I wanted to help her facilitate the process. One Saturday after church, the “big shot click” got together and had their informal chat. I was outside just chatting and having fun with the other youths of the church as usual; cracking jokes, throwing a little heckle here and there; as we all recount old story and have a good laugh.

While I was outside, Venus John exited the church, a kind of hot; she came up to me and said, you still insisting on keeping this group and bringing the world into the church. I did not know where this hostility that Venus was showing me came from. Up to this point Venus and I had a good relationship. As a result a little back and forth between Venus and I ensued. Then Venus declared, "You see that recording you have at 705 Radio, that they normally play on the radio, It will disappear, I will get the rid of it. You will never hear it on the radio again.

What did that mean, was Venus going to use her office and her official access to destroy the recording the girls and I spend so much time to put together; so we can share with the St. Vincent and the Grenadines listeners what we were doing. If she did that amounted up to a crime. I just could not believe what I was hearing coming from the mouth of a public Servant.

This was a public declaration, of a blatant intent, to Misuse her office and destroy property belonging to a sate agency. Venus John was an executive at the National Broadcasting Corporation, the sole radio Station on the island, and she had access. But most importantly, there is nothing I could have done to stop her from doing what she declared, she was going to do. I did not have any control over her actions, As a result, I say to her, "Venus, you are the big shot, you have the power to do whatever you choose to and you could do whatever you choose to do."

I was hoping Venus did not take so drastic an action. After all, I have never offended her, and we always had a very good relationship. However, after Venus John made the threats I stop hearing the song on the Radio. I said to myself maybe Venus lived up to her threats and destroyed the tape with the song of Allan P and the Jewels.

There was nothing, I could have done so I moved on with my life. Accepting the fact, in this world there will be people, who are placed in position, to up lift their fellow men, but often misuse and abuse their post and do the direct opposite to their calling. Life went on, I forgot about Venus’ threats, I was not sure if she destroys the tape or not, I had no proof to say she did; however, the absence of the song being played on the radio suggested that she did. After Venus' threats to destroy the recording, I have never heard the song played on the radio again.

By this time the Church have forgotten about the group and I, and they had moved on. and then, I began to hear whispers in the church, and there were many angry faces that accompanied the whispers and there were the tears of Venus John that flowed freely along with the whispers. What had happened everyone asks. In church the women are always crying over a fail marriages, the infidelity of a husband, the arrest of a wayward child, etc. Could it be that Venus John’s husband was butting her, I asked myself. But the whispers only seem to get lower with my efforts to find out what was happening.

At first everything was kept hidden, the whispers were loud enough to know that something was wrong; but they were not loud enough to be understood, what was going on, and the legs of whispers did not walk into my circle. However, it was not too long that I got wind of what the whispers were all about. By this time the comess came into my directions and fell into my lap. My snooping around to get the scoop did not bear any dividend, however, later the whispers got loud enough for me to hear and understand what was going on; by this time it was now public knowledge.

I had already “thrown water” on Venus' threats, and moved on. I discovered, that the Government had made Venus' post at the National Broadcasting Corporation redundant, paid her, her severance and now she was out of a Job. Venus came to me and discussed this matter, on several occasions, I did not know why, however; I got the impression she wanted my sympathy and hoped that I would have wrote an article, which were normally published in the local News paper, to bring attention to her cause. However, the thought never crossed my mind.

While in discussion, Venus related to me her conviction that the Government was victimizing her, but when I asked why would they: she said she didn't know. her answer was strange, because everyone, who was ever victimized, always have a vivid picture of why they were and are being victimized. The reason may not be justified, or right but the reason is always known. it may even be a misunderstanding or a miscommunications or something but the reason is always known. Since Venus did not have or claimed to know the reason then; in my mind, maybe the lost of her Job was an act of Government cutting back on wasted spending.

However, it was ironic, the job and the post that give Venus John access to illegally destroyed the young group's recording, was ripped from right under her. Now she was not even allowed onto the property except to collect her belonging.

It was later revealed why Venus John's job was made redundant and that was because she, used her office too be continued - Joking!

True Story - Allan Palmer homosexual encounters! An attempt to exploit.

In October of 2018, I brought to your attention, via a true story, my narrow escape from becoming a victim of a well-known Pedophile, who have been raking havoc within the Kingstown area. His name was Mr. Millington. I almost become a victim, when I, at a tender age, left my parents home unsupervised by an adult and went to the St. Vincent and the Grenadines traditional morning festival: Nine Mornings.

Had it not been for the intervention of the fervent prayer of a dying mother; who went onto her knees and did not move from that posture, until I returned to the safety of her arms; along with an earlier confrontation by my father that put the predator in check and the grace of God, that aid me to escaped the dirty engagement of the pedophile. Had it not been for the combinations of the above; my life would have been forever different today, and so would have been all of my experiences.

I was four years, eleven months old, when I was enrolled and began school, as a student at the Kingstown Methodist School, My first day, my first week at school was a disaster; however, it started out quite well. I had my little school uniform, blue short-sleeve, button down shirt, and a karkie short pants, with a pee hope to aid unsupervised urinating without spill accident. I also had a nice little book bag, with one big line exercise book and one small exercise book; I also had a new "New Nelson West Indian Reader." The book featured Master Willie, Mother Hen and Percy the Chuck.

My mother had been speaking to me about school for a month or so. She excitedly said things like, “you are a big boy now; you will be going to school soon.” I liked the fact mother was happy when she expressed the thought, I was a big boy and if going to school meant, I was a big boy; which made mother happy, then I am in. At that age, my sisters Clair was in high School, and my other sisters Charmaine and Andrea were still in school, I could recalled they were students of the Kingstown Methodist School.

So I should have understood, what was required. But the reality was, I did not. My mother proudly dressed me in my uniform; the proud and dignified Mrs. Palmer took me to school, I clearly did not know that my mother was going to hand me over to some strange lady. then abandoned me in this strange environment.

Mother handed me over to Miss Velma Jackson, who put me to sit in the class with a big group of other children. Children I did not know, or care to know. Mother, looked at me with pride in her eyes, proud of my conduct, then she wave good bye to me. After which, Mother turned off and left. I honestly couldn't believe, my dear mother, who always told me she loved me, was going to abandoned me in this noisy building, with a strange woman I did not know and a group of children I did not care to know.

Well, not a totally strange woman, for I have seen Mother visiting, this women on her job and speak to her, some months before. Mother often took me to the school with her, and speak to Mrs. Jackson in order to get me accustom to the environment and the lady, who will have care and custody of me, upon enrollment. At least in the initial stages. However, I was always on the look out for my favorite sister Charmaine. I never ever got to see Charmaine because she was in a class on the upstairs. However, Andrea was in class next to the walkway and I always saw her. This was my mother's way of preparing me for my new environment.

How am going to get home, is she ever coming back for me. I totally forgot that I had two older sisters that attend the same school. I honestly do not remember what thoughts I had, but my mother was leaving me alone. I had never been left alone with anyone outside of my immediate family before. Now I am being handed over and was being left with a stranger.

This could not be good, my response was to cry, sorry not cry, I ball for my mother, I attempted to go in pursuit of my mother, but I was blocked by Miss Jackson my first teacher. This made matters worse. My mother came back, all heartbroken because, she has never heard me cried with such deep sorrow and desperation before.

Miss. Jackson who was an experience teacher, told my mother: go Mrs. Palmer, he will eventually stop crying. apparently, Miss. Jackson, had dealt with children like me, who had separation anxiety. This went on for a few days, with no relenting. Then my father suggested that my big brother Albert "Skipper" Palmer take me to school, at least, Albert was a teacher, he will know how to better deal with me, after a while I settled in and was ok.

I was still insecure about being away from home and my mother. One day, I went to the boy’s toilet to urinate, I saw Winston Knights, in the boys toilet at the filthy urinal urinating. I knew Winston because, he was the New addition to the Knights family. The Knights was our neighbor and he was their grandson. I was very good friends with Winston’s cousins, with whom I played together and had lots of fun every day.

When I walked into the toilet I saw Winston standing at the Urinal, We were in the same age group. The other people who were using the urinal with him, had left the urinal and the toilet yet he was still there; when I got into the toilet, he was still there, when I got to the urinal, he was still there, when I began to urinate and when I was finished he was still there.

I was not old enough neither was I experience enough to know that this behavior was not normal. Then Winston looked over at me and he said, would you like me to show you something, you have never seen before. I didn't know what he was speaking of. I wondered, what could Winston show me that I don't know or have never seen before. The reality was, at that stage, the level of my knowledge, my experience and at my age, there were many things I did not know and have never seen before. But both Winston and I were in the same age group, we were supposed to know just about the same things.

However, I told Winston yes. Immediately; Winston, without any apprehension, or hesitation and with the courage of an adult; walked over to me, took his hands, held my penis, in a manner that triggered an erection. I was shocked, and he was correct, at this stage of my life, I did not know that was possible. Up to this point in my life, I thought an erected penis was only possible, in the morning, when one awoke, and the penis loses its stiffness after urinating. Then Winston said to me, “have you ever seen that before?” I said no.

I was fascinated with this boy’s knowledge, how did he know this, I asked myself. This little kid had a new suggestions he said, let's touch penis together. I did not know what was supposed to happen, so I turned to face him and he took his penis and touch my penis. Then he asked, have you ever done that before I said no. I was unsure about all these new things but the way Winston was casual and his confidence, about what he was asking me to do; I got the impression: this was something, he did every day, I thought this was all normal behavior that people did ever day, but I did not know about it.

All this time, we we're still in the urinating position with our penis through the little pee hole in our pants. Then the kid had another suggestion; he said, pull down your pants and turn around, this suggestion was a stretch. So I said what you are going to do. It was then Winston boldly and casually, said, I am going to put my penis into your bottom. I was five years old, and I have never heard of this before. The five year old said those words so casually and boldly, like this was something he did all the time, something; I should have been doing all my life; the only thing was, I have never heard of this before.

Immediately, I knew this was something I did not want to do. I said to the disgusting five year old, I don't want to do that. I quickly slipped my penis back into my pants via the little pee-hole that was neatly cut into an infant male pants to help them with easy bathroom access; and I ran out of the toilet immediately. 

From that day, each time I had to use the bathroom, I first peeped into the bathroom, to see if Winston was in the toilet. If he was in the toilet, which he was most of the time, I urinated against the wall outside the bathroom. Because Winston’s seems to always be in the boys toilet, the wall outside the toilet became my new urinal.

Later that day; when I reached home, and my best friend came by to play, I told him what happened, he was just as naive as I was. So I asked him if he would like me to show him, he said yes. So I proceeded to show him. After I demonstrated the occurrence to my friend, sharing with him my new knowledge, it was time to move forward, with life. I have never shared this experience, with anyone but my childhood friend; to whom I demonstrated the events to.

In my life I have had two other older boys try to take homosexual advantage of me. Even before I was old enough to enter school, These were older, trusted family friend or family. Although, I was not sexually violated, the actions they took amount up to crimes and it burned a scar into my memory. I have never for one day forget these event. and every detail is clearly burnt on the chambers of my mind.

The two older, trusted boys, realize I was trusting and a child steep in naivety. one of them was my favorite cousin Henry "Five-O Palmer, who was much older than I was, and the other person was Steve Harry, the grandson of Rose Dounce, a family friend. However, their actions amounts up to a sexual assault; and I thank Yahweh who kept me from being buggered.

Now that I understand the seriousness of homosexuality, it would have been easier and more acceptable to me, for those guys to have murder me in cold blood. Although I was not buggered by any of these guys, or anyone for that fact, I hate these guys with a deadly passion. For they have, betrayed my trust in them, they betrayed my friendship and they have betrayed my family confidence. But what is worst they try to destroy my life; by expressed to me, the greatest degree of hate, one human can expressed to another.

What they tried to do to me, was to condemn me to eternal death. I thank and I praise Yah, for loving me so much that he protected and preserved me from the demons that possessed these people.